jwakeboarder03

Im rather excited after everything thats went bad lately, good is finally starting to happen! Work has been going great, I got a new desk, Im moved out of the new people section, and the girl that sits behinds me who Ive thought was really cute, started talking to me today, and she asked me out to lunch on Friday, Im really excited. So today we passed Sticky Notes back and forth all day haha, it was fun, made time go by faster. Ive thought this girl was really cute since I started, but I was always kind of shy around here, but now were awesome! Its going to be cool Chris is gonna work there pretty soon too. So alot of shits happened lately, not really gonna get into it, but Im keeping my head held high, because Im sure in the end its probably for the best....everything happens for a reason. Not saying I want that person gone, but if all were going to do is argue then we might as well pack up and move along. So works been going really good, already in bonus this week, and its just Wednesday, so that rocks! Finally got my new desk all situated, went out last night and bought some office supplies, pen holder, stacking paper trays, paper clip holder, thumbtacks, pens, and stuff like that. It looks pretty cool, got a bunch of pics from the lake last summer, and a bunch of wakeboarding pictures. So anyways Im about to take a shower and head to bed, cuz tomorows gonna be a busy/long day cuz its THIRSTY THURSDAY! That means me and Al will be at Mandys!

Why is it whenever I let someone in my life, I get burned. I have a hard time letting people know the real me, and the ones that do are the ones that pretend they care, but when Im gone are the ones who dont care. Thats why I just need my space from everyone, just block myself out of everyones lives, and it will make everyone happier, if I just disappeared. Just pretend you never knew me, and you will be fine without me. Maybe I should never have let anyone in, cuz I knew from the beginning Id get hurt, but I thought this person was different, I thought she was sweet, she wasnt like anyone else Id ever met, but I was wrong, she was worse than anyone I had ever met. But yet I still love her....why? Why do I love someone who can rip my heart out of my chest daily, stab it apart, and yet still fall asleep with this girl on my mind? Why is it the ones that I forgive the most for their mistakes, are the ones who forgive me the least for mine? I know I am not perfect, far from it, and so is everyone else. Alot of people wouldnt be in my life if at some point I didnt accept their apoligies, but they dont see things like I do I guess? If I didnt accept an apoligy back in the fall, we'd still not be speaking today, now I think why did I?

Tell me what I have to do tonight
Cause I'd do anything to make it right
Let's be us again
I'm sorry for the way I lost my head
I dont why I said the things I said
Lets be us again

Here I stand with everything to lose
All I know is I dont wanna ever see the end
Baby please, I'm reachin out for you
Won't you open up your heart and let me come back in
Lets be us again
Us again

Look at me Im way past pride
Isn't there some way that we can try
To be us again
Even if it takes a while
I'll wait right here until I see that smile
That says we're us again

Here I stand with everything to lose
All I know is I dont wanna ever see the end
Baby please, I'm reachin out for you
Won't you open up your heart and let me come back in
Lets be us
Ohhh

Baby baby, what would I do
Can't imagine life without you

Here I stand with everything to lose
All I know is I dont wanna ever see the end
Baby please I'm reachin out for you
Won't you open up your heart and let me come back in
Oh here I am I'm reachin out for you
Won't you open up your heart and let me come back in
Lets be us again
Oh, lets be us again

It's your life, you say you need a change
Don't all the dreams we've seen come true mean anything
You say it's different now and you keep staring at the door
How can you walk away, don't I matter anymore.

If being free is worth what you leave behind
And if it's too late for love to change your mind
Then it's goodbye time.

If we had known our love would come to this
We could have saved our hearts the hurt of wasted years
Well it's been fun what else can I say
If the feelings gone words won't stop you anyway.

If being free is worth what you leave behind
And if it's too late for love to change your mind
Then it's goodbye time

I think you're making a huge mistake
By giving up on me and you
Because I can totally guarantee
No one will ever love you like I do
It'll be almost impossible to find someone
Who will show you as much affection
And it'd be a miracle to find someone
Who will give you as much attention
I know we had a few problems between us
But that's normal for couples to do
And it'd be so easy for us to fix it
If you would just let me love you
But instead you're pushing me away
And ignoring the whole situation
You can't just put love on hold
Cuz Love doesn't take vacations
Every time you look at me
I can still see the love in your eyes
Why can't you just express it
Instead of keeping it inside
I can see that it hurts you deep inside
That we're no longer together
So just stop being so damn stubborn
And let me make you happy forever

She's a yellow pair of running shoes
A holey pair of jeans
She looks great in cheap sunglasses
She looks great in anything
She's I want a piece of chocolate
Take me to a movie
She's I can't find a thing to wear
Now and then she's moody

She's a Saturn with a sunroof
With her brown hair a-blowing
She's a soft place to land
And a good feeling knowing
She's a warm conversation
That I wouldn't miss for nothing
She's a fighter when she's mad
And she's a lover when she's loving

And she's everything I ever wanted
And everything I need
I talk about her, I go on and on and on
'Cause she's everything to me

She's a Saturday out on the town
And a church girl on Sunday
She's a cross around her neck
And a cuss word 'cause its Monday
She's a bubble bath and candles
Baby come and kiss me
She's a one glass of wine
And she's feeling kinda tipsy

She's the giver I wish I could be
And the stealer of the covers
She's a picture in my wallet
Of my unborn children's mother
She's the hand that I'm holding
When I'm on my knees and praying
She's the answer to my prayer
And she's the song that I'm playing

And she's everything I ever wanted
And everything I need
I talk about her, I go on and on and on
'Cause she's everything to me

She's the voice I love to hear
Someday when I'm ninety
She's that wooden rocking chair
I want rocking right beside me
Everyday that passes
I only love her more
Yeah, she's the one
That I'd lay down my own life for

And she's everything I ever wanted
And everything I need
She's everything to me
Yeah she's everything to me

Everything I ever wanted
And everything I need
She's everything to me

So its been a while since I updated, been pretty busy, and now Im currently sick. I have about the sorest throat you could possibly have. I knew I was bound to get it, all my friends have had it, so it was my turn. But anyways this past weekend was pretty cool. Thursday Craig, Means, and me went down to Bootleggers, and that was a total blast! I dont think I ever had so much fun in a club, I didnt wanna leave. It was pretty fun watching all the drunks. Friday I slept in, then went up to Detroit with Chris for the SuperBowl festivities, got to meet quite a few celebs at the Ren Cen. We met Tom Arnold, Shaun Salisbury, Sean Alexander, and we seen Tom Brady, Reggie Bush, Kid Rock, Cheryl Crow, and the Maxum models. It was a blast, we headed back to town and went down to Lenawee Rec with my Uncle, then Craig, Means, and Morris came down, and they all drank there, so I ended up driving Craigs truck home cuz he was so plastered, then we go up to Theo's dorm, and Craig started talking shit to someone on the phone, and all hell broke loose then. Saturday didnt really do much, slept in all day, cuz I thought it was going to snow hard, so Id be out working all night with Craig, but all we got was a dusting, and that pissed me off. Finally ended up going out to Applebees at like 10:30 with the clan, and Sunday I didnt do shit, I slept in all day, stayed home and watched the game, and thats about all really. Anyways I got some errands to take care of, so Im outtie.

So today Ive done alot of thinking, Im changing my life around, get it back in the right direction. I have goals set again. Lately Ive worried about everyone else but myself, and that has to come to a stop. Today I went out and applied at Dave Knapp Ford, for a car salesman, and I also applied to do Drafting and designing for an aluminum company, which would actually be better, because Im great at drafting, I took 4 years of it in high school, and still do some part time drafting for my Dad still. Plus I know the drafting job pays $25 an hour, and its full time, so thats about a $1000 a week to sit behind a computer. Theres no more me going out drinking and partying, no more Club Keno, no more Jager Bombs, no more stuff like that. Im starting today being serious about life, and right now no one believes me, thinking next weekend Ill be back out partying, but Im going to prove everyone wrong, but Im not doing it for anyone, Im doing it because my life was starting spiral downward, and I had a few wake up calls this week that I need to change things. Right now I have a goal by my birthday to have a new truck, hopefully a Chevy Silverado 2500 4x4, I dont think Im going to outright buy it, but a lease wouldnt be so bad, except insurance is going to rape me, but no matter what I get its going to. Hopefully within a month Im going to get back on my feet, and get out of this mess. Ive came to the conclusion, I have nothing to be depressed or upset about anymore, what am I going to do, sit home and pout cuz I totalled my car? Nope, Im going to get out there find a new job, and get a car twice as nice. Anyways dinner is almost done, so Im out

Im so happy today, I have my unemployment check coming tomorow, and I can finally go pay my ticket, and get my phone back on. Im going out this afternoon as son as my Mom gets outta work, so I can take her car, and go out and apply for a few jobs, theres one at Dave Knapps that Im gonna try to get as a car salesman. The money is petty good, but best of all its guaranteed hours and insurance, and thats what I need the most. So this past weekend was pretty crazy, but I really dont wanna talk much about it, cuz it sucked. I lost a best friend, she wont speak to me, I just wish she would write me back, so I could apoligize, but she wont even reply. So I dunno what to do anymore, I miss her as a friend so much.......Anyways I gotta get in the shower.

So since my last update, alot of shit has happened, for one Im carless. I totalled my car, lets just say not even one block from my house. I was on my way to my Uncle Jakes new duplex on Wednesday, just backed out of my driveway, fiddling with my iPod, made it two driveways down, and I went up the curb, hit a power pole, and flipped my car, it rolled down Maumee St one and a half times. I dont actually remember the rolling part, I remember having the crawl out of the passenger side window that was broken out. I didnt even call 911 I was so shook up, the first person I called was my Mom, she didnt answer, I called my Grandma she didnt answer, so I called my Uncle Jake, and he answered and came over immediately with my Grandpa, then he went to pick my Mom up from work. I just wanted my Mom there in the worst way, cuz the one person I wanted there the most couldnt be, plus I am glad she wasnt, cuz I wouldnt want her to see me hurt, or my car upside down. I didnt get hurt very much from it, except I did cut my hands up pretty well, bruised my knees up pretty good, and got some whiplash from the airbags. Except the next morning I felt like someone punched every inch of my body, even my toes. That first night, everytime I fell asleep I had nightmares of the car rolling over, and over, and over. So overall it was a shitty night, well a week. I have been a real asshole this week too, my friends trying be there for me, and Ive been quick to run my mouth off, just being real assholelike. I just hope everyone understands Im not trying to be rude or mean, I am just going through alot right now, my Dad still hasnt spoke to me since the accident, and I wish he would. I just hope everyone really understands! Im sorry